Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Company News

An exciting week at work so far...

We had an article in the Dallas Morning News over the weekend:
http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/fea/shopping/stories/DN-Hall_28bus.ART0.State.Edition1.1cbd0a8.html

AND...Channel 8 News was here filming yesterday, and we got a nice segment on the 5:00 PM edition with this guy. We had a 'news watching party' in the breakroom, complete with champagne and popcorn. How fun! (No, I wasn't on TV, they had plenty of people to appear.) Here's the text of the segment:
http://www.wfaa.com/sharedcontent/dws/wfaa/latestnews/stories/wfvaa070130_lj_brady.3574e70d.html

This is indeed a very exciting and awesome product, and the people who work here are just amazing. I'm really happy to be a part of it. Pretty cool.

Friday, January 26, 2007

Good things from this week

Focusing on the good things that have happened, the things that made me smile.

The cashier at Schlotzsky’s told me I smelled good.
“Who smells good?” I asked.
“You do!” he said.
“Really?” I was boggled that my perfume could be noticed from behind a counter in a shop full of sandwich smells.
“Yeah, like vanilla.” Then I realized that I had just put on some hand lotion before I left the office.
“Well, I do enjoy smelling like cake whenever I can.”

He looked at me kinda funny but laughed anyway.

Got a message on Myspace from the Hood, saying I was missed in the comedy world.
Aww. I miss you guys too. I'm not gone forever. Just taking a hiatus.

The boyfriend actually read my blog and made a funny as hell comment which nearly made me spit tea all over my desk. I love that man. And I love that he watches these stupid shows with me.

I made people laugh with some jokes I’m working on. One was a co-worker. He’s selling Girl Scout cookies for his daughter, and he asked if I was ever in the scouts.


“Yeah, but I wasn’t a very good Girl Scout. My sewing badge fell off.”
Someone told me a while back that it was a ‘hack’ joke. I don’t know, I think I could add some stuff to it and make it work.

The other joke involves my horrible job-interviewing process over my 3 month stint of unemployment. I may write about it, I haven’t decided.

Our attorney and settlement woes from the car accident last year are soon to be settled. That's definitely something to look forward to.

A good week overall. I forget to look at the good stuff too most of the time.

Smiles, everyone, smiles!

Thursday, January 25, 2007

More TV fun

Ok, this one IS a guilty pleasure. Although it usually ends up making me feel sad.

Cheaters.

What a show.

It’s filmed here in the Dallas area, which adds just a bit more intrigue as I try to discern where the people are exactly. I recognize the locations some of the time, but not always.

Like a train wreck or a car crash, I want to look away, but I’m somehow drawn to the pain and suffering of women and men being cheated on by their spouses/partners. It’s interesting to watch the reactions of the people who have been caught. Sometimes they are remorseful, but often times, they really don’t give a damn that they’ve hurt someone who loved them. They brush it off as nothing and move on with their lives. And this is what I don’t understand. Infidelity has such a damaging and lasting effect on people. How can they not even care?

My dad was a cheater. He’s had 3 wives and wasn’t faithful to any of them. And people wonder why I’m so jaded. I’m quite certain that if the show “Cheaters” and today’s technology had been around in 1978, my mother certainly would have enlisted their services in catching him at it.

But she did catch him, without the help of high-tech spying equipment and a private investigator. No, she did her own PI work. She had the intuition, a gut feeling, and she was absolutely right.

Dad left his first wife for my mother. Then he left her for some other woman, but ended up marrying someone else. Just a year into that marriage, he cheated on her too, but apparently she had some magical vice grip on his balls that prevented him from doing it again. Or maybe he just got sneakier. Who knows.

Cheating is one of my very few deal breakers in a relationship. I have no tolerance for unfaithfulness, and I fail to understand why some people find it acceptable. But hey, to each their own. I just won’t have it in my life.

The last time I watched “Cheaters”, the ending segment was dedicated to a man who had passed away. He was one of the cheating husbands they had busted in a previous episode. And the funniest thing about it was how they referred to him:


“The beloved suspect”

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Chefy goodness

I'm having one of those weeks where everything I do is *wrong*. I hate those. So, instead of dwelling on my weaknesses and mistakes, we'll talk about my favorite reality TV show, mkay?

This week: It's
Top Chef.

I wouldn't call it a guilty pleasure, because it's actually a very good show. Watching it makes me want to improve my cooking skillz.
So, after last nite's cook-off in Hawaii, Ilan and Marcel will be going head to head in the finale. My favorite lines from last nite's show:


Ilan: "I can't wait to make you cry tomorrow."

Marcel: "It'll take more than paprika to make me cry."

Oh, snap! You've just been served, chef style! I guess that means it's 'on' now.

Oh yeah, you'll be crying, Marcel. I'm totally pulling for Ilan, because I think he's a better chef, and also because Marcel has Mr. Heat Miser hair:




Marcel says:
"It needs FOAM!"
I was sorry to see Sam go. He truly is a very good chef. Even though he didn't have much in the peronality department, he loved to cook and you could see that. I have to give him props for taking the time on their two-month break to visit a famous pastry chef in order to improve upon his weakest skill. He offered to do her dishes in exchange for the training. That's commitment right there. Kudos to you, Sam.
My favorite chef throughout the competition was Michael. He started off pretty weak, but in the last two challenges before his elimiation, he pulled off some top-notch dishes. He was the underdog, the lazy, laid-back dude with the 'I don't really give a shit' attitude. Apparently, he was classicly trained at a very fine culinary school. But to look at him, you'd think he was a line cook at a Waffle House. I think that's what I liked about him.
Next week, the finale. And then what will I do with my Wednesday nites?

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Sunday, January 21, 2007

Religion goes to the dogs

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

"The power of Christ compels you to Sit, Fluffy! SIT!"

Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting

Be gone, foul ball-licking demon, BE GONE!

Hahahah. I got these from an article on Yahoo about a Catholic church blessing people's animals. More pictures are here: http://news.yahoo.com/photos/sm/events/lf/011907sananton/p:5
(captions featured on my page, compliments of Jenn and Evan. Cuz we're funny like dat.)

Saturday, January 20, 2007

18. She made it.

Today is The Teen's 18th birthday. How she's made it this far without me killing her is a mystery. I guess we really are stronger than we think we are.

So, to celebrate her birthday, and the pain that I went thru in order to bring this child into the world, I refer you to a previous blog entry - the amusing tale of my trip to the hospital: Labor, birth, repeat.


http://randomjenn.blogspot.com/2005/07/labor-birth-repeat.html

Enjoy!

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Friday, January 19, 2007

Nothing going on

I have absolutely nothing of interest to discuss today.

No funny musings. No complaining. No extra happy thoughts to share.

Nada. Nothing. Zilch.

I'm not happy, but I'm not sad.

I don't feel great, but I don't feel awful.

I'm just sorta, here.

Welcome to my indifference.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Holy freezing rain, Batman!

Ok. It's not funny anymore.

It was so cute when the weather decided to get yucky and keep me inside for the weekend. Aww, that was adorable.

And Monday when my boss called and said, "Don't bother today", aww, that was really cute.

But when I woke up this morning and saw white stuff on the ground, and began to be bombarded with reports from the news of 'stay home, it's not worth it'....well, it just lost all of its cuteness.

400 school districts are closed today.

I really would rather go to work. I don't want to stay home again.

This is nuts.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Video killed the comedy star...with sharp icicles

It's still very, very cold. A nice layer of ice remains on one side of the car, because it hasn't been warm enough yet to melt it away. It's funny to see cars driving around with icicles hanging from them.

Two ice storms in Dallas in less than 2 months. Hooray for winter! But this one wasn't so bad, and it's safe to drive today.

Tonite, I get to pick up the item that may very well change our lives: A video camera.

("Our" lives as in me and the people I spend my time with, just to clarify. I doubt this will be a life-changing event for anyone reading this...wow, I do tend to blather on in parentheses, don't I?)

A late Christmas gift for us, I managed to procure from a trusted source (daughter's boyfriend) a video camera that has been used gently and infrequently. The boyfriend has wanted one as long as I've known him, but they are soooo expensive, and borrowing one is just inconvenient most of the time. So now we can put all of those crazy skits and sketches we've been dreaming up over the past year onto film.

Look out, You Tube.

And, for the WoW geek in all of us...that's World of Warcraft for the uninformed...we obtained a copy of The Burning Crusade last nite, the very first upgrade/expansion for the game. Well, I say 'we', but I didn't go stand in line at the video game store at 11 Pm to wait for the midnite release. Maybe if I was off work today, I would have joined him in line, but probably not. From what I gathered in my sleepyness when he finally came to bed at 4 AM, apparently it rocks and was worth the $40. Unfortunately, we still have to buy two more copies. Thanks, Blizzard. Money hungry bastards. You already got us in the wallet with 3 copies of the game, and 3 monthly account charges. And now we have to buy three copies of the expansion. Someone is making a buttload of money. But it is an amazing game. 7 million people can't be wrong.

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Monday, January 15, 2007

Cold....in so many ways

If your boyfriend/girlfriend/spouse/life partner leaves you a lovie dovie smoochie comment on your MySpace page...is that considered a public display of affection?

No, mine didn't do that. He doesn't even mention my existence on his page, so I was referring to some others I've seen recently. I've decided that young love makes me want to hurl. I'm all for it, don't get me wrong. But, much like real life PDA's, I'd rather not have to look at it.

It's cold. Far too cold to be a smoker who won't smoke inside the house.

There is a thin sheet of ice on my street, just daring me to get into the car and slide my way to the other end.

Nah. Not today.
You win, ice. You win.

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Tuesday, January 09, 2007

I don't want to brag...

Ok, maybe a little.

Right now I'm just feeling *good*.
Happy and good.
I'm feeling funny again.
I got my haircut and it looks fabulous.
I'm putting my resolutions into action and I know that I will see awesome results from them.

It's good to feel this way. It makes everyone around me a little happier when I'm smiling. The last few days have been great. I got off work a little early yesterday and the boyfriend and I had a nice meal together, before he had to go to work. We laughed and talked and it just felt good to be with him. Not that it doesn't normally, but some days we just feel closer than normal. We made the waitress lady laugh, like we always do. I love when we leave a place and someone says, "You guys really made my day. You were fun." That's a good feeling.

We talked about planning a 'family' vacation for the summer, somewhere cool to take the kids. There's a million places we could go. We talked about everything and nothing, all at once. Then he was off to work, and even though he was leaving, I still felt good. I decided to take a quick nap, and the next thing I know, he's back at home! Class was cancelled, so he came in to snuggle with me for a while. What a nice surprise. We laughed and talked some more, about silly things. Then we played some World of Warcraft, ordered a pizza, and watched what will probably be the worst reality show ever on television. But he watched it. Why? Because I wanted to watch it. That's what couples do. It's all a give and take. Relationships are all about Compromise. I'll play video games with you, if you'll watch the stupid shows that I like. I'll cook nice meals for you, if you help out with the dishes once in a while. And I will love you, and all you really have to do is love me back. The concept of unconditional love is starting to make more sense to me.

It feels so good to laugh. I've been doing a lot of that lately, the kind of laughter that is uncontrollable and leaves your stomach muscles twitching. The kind of laughter that brings tears to your eyes. The kind of laughter that makes other people around you laugh. Infectious. Uninhibited. I love that.

Enjoy your moments.
Laugh today.
Love today.
Live today.

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Monday, January 08, 2007

Precarious

Dammit.

There's a reason I don't get involved in peoples' love lives.

Once upon a time, there was this boy. And he met this girl. We'll call them B for boy and G for girl, to keep things simple. They were dating.

E (that's my bf), is friends with B. I made friends with G, but we weren't really close. We hung out a few times, because she was B's girlfriend.

B and G break up, but I didn't know about it. I found G on Myspace and sent her a message, just to say hello. She wrote back "I guess you heard by now". She was, of course, speaking of her breakup with B. B had only recently discosed this to E, so I was late in getting the news. I wrote back to G and told her I was sorry to hear about the breakup, and to stay in touch.

So today I get a message from G. She wants to know if I was in a certain place on a certain evening, because B had sent her a text saying he was in the place, and perhaps, that I was there as well.

I was not.

Now, here's the dilemma. If I had to choose who my loyalties would be toward, I would choose B, because he truly seems like a very nice guy, and I'm not one to take the girl's side, just cuz she's a female. Not that I don't like G, but now I'm concerned about her need to check up on him. That's obsessive. That's not cool. That's something I would do. But anyway...I think I would prefer to take his side, if indeed I have to choose one.

But here's the thing: I don't know how to respond to her message. I thought about waiting until the next day to write back, but then she may think I'm ignoring her, and then she might get like Crazy Bitch Girl (CBG) who wanted to live in my house and flip out on me because I failed to respond in a 24 hour window. That would suck. But, do I call B and ask him what the story is? Where exactly was he that nite, and what is my involvement? Now there's an awkward conversation...

"Uh, hey!....No, this isn't E...Oh, you figured that out by the voice....haha....So, how you doin? Good. Yeah, weekend was good....yeah, he's good....um, listen....how do you feel about stalkers?...."

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Friday, January 05, 2007

Bubbly and sweet.

If Dr. Pepper or Coca Cola flowed from the fawcets like water, would we still buy it in 12-packs and 2 liters?

(Jenn is currently going thru Dr. Pepper withdrawal, and desperately hopes with every sip of water that it will somehow magically start to taste like a carbonated beverage.)

Day 4. Water and coffee only. I won't drink diet soda because to me, they taste like shit and cough syrup.

I won't give up the coffee. Oh no. You can't make me.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Lyrical

Unravel me
a distant cord
on the outside is forgotten
a constant need to get along
and the animal awakens
and all I feel is black and white

The road is long
the memory slides to the whole of my undoing
put aside
I put away, I push it back to get through each day
and all I feel is black and white
and I'm wound up small and tight
and I don't know who I am

Everybody loves you when you're easy
everybody hates when you're a bore
everyone is waiting for your entrance
so don't disappoint them

Unravel me
untie this cord
the very centre of our union is caving in
I can't endure
I am the archive of our failure

And all I feel is black and white
and I'm wound up small and tight
and I don't know who I am

Everybody loves you when you're easy
everybody hates when you're a bore
everyone is waiting for your entrance
so don't disappoint them
Everybody loves you when you're easy

so don't disappoint them
Don't disappoint them.


Black and White ~ Sarah MacLachlan

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Resolved; or To Kill A Bird

I drank one whole glass of water yesterday, so my resolution to drink more water has been fulfilled.

Next!

I talked to my mom and a couple of friends who I hadn’t spoken with in a while.

Done.

Ryan, one of my old comedy buddies, who was actually with me on the night that the boyfriend and I met; (sadly, I'm pretty sure I ended up ditching him later that evening so Evan and I could go hang out); and my friend Russ from Houston called to wish me a happy new year. He was there at the very beginning of my stand-up career. (Snort, career, like I’m making money at it now.) He was in the audience when I competed in the Houston’s Funniest Person contest in May of 2002. I had been doing stand-up for all of three months at that point. After seeing me a few years later, he was amazed at my progress. Hell, so was I. Oh, and he's also the guy who my ex-husband swears I was having an affair with. Nope. He was dating my married next door neighbor. Yes, my life was a soap opera.


Moving on...

Spent some time with The Teen last nite.

Booyah.

Three resolutions in one nite! I’m on a roll.

She’ll be turning 18 on January 20th. I doubt she’ll want to spend her birthday with me, but I did invite them to the Comedy Sportz show. My treat, of course. It’s early enough, she could still go hang out with her friends afterward.

Conversations with my mother are a little nutty. Partly because she’s nuts, and partly because she spends half of the time yelling at her bird. She’s had this parrot for, well, forever. To give you an idea of how old he is – his name is Mork. Yeah, there used to be a Mindy too, but she flew away many years ago. She got him in the 70’s, and I swear he will outlive us all.

Mork is a cranky old thing, not unlike my mother. He hates it when she talks on the phone, so he makes as much noise as he can muster, and it makes her sound like she has Turrets syndrome. Our conversations go something like this:

Me: “Hey mom, how are you?”

Mom: “I’m ok. Just got home from work and I was getting ready to…SHUT UP YOU BASTARD….make me something to eat…”

Me: “Oh, ok then. What are you having for dinner?”

Mom: “I don’t know, I think I’ll just have a sandwich…I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL KILL YOU IF YOU DON’T SHUT UP….maybe some ham, I got some of that thin sliced stuff from the deli…YOU STUPID FUCKER, I SAID SHUT UP…”

Me: “Uh, well, that sounds good.”

Mom: “Yeah, I’m too tired to cook. When are you bringing the kids…..I HATE YOU, I WILL RIP OFF YOUR BEAK AND TURN YOU INTO SOUP…over to visit?”

Me: “I don’t know, mom. Maybe when your bird is dead.”

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Tuesday, January 02, 2007

The second day of the New Year...

Weee.

My mother always says that whatever you’re doing on New Year’s day is what you’ll be doing for the rest of the year.

I slept late, cooked one of the boyfriend's favorite meals, and played World of Warcraft.

Sounds like a fun year ahead, don’t it?

Hope everyone had a safe and happy New Year’s Eve. I spent my first ever New Year’s Eve at Comedy Sportz. I really enjoyed myself, although the West End was a freaking nightmare, overflowing with people who looked far too young to be drinking. Maybe I’m just getting old. Trying to get to the bathroom was ridiculous, and people were smoking inside the building, which is a big no-no since it’s historical and all. Ahh well.

CSz did two shows, Evan ref’d the first and I worked at the door, handing out coupons while Melissa stamped hands and Jill and Rachelle passed out festive hats. I wore a tiara. I think I should wear one every day. I’m not sure how to incorporate that into my wardrobe. There were good audiences for both shows. We did a ‘champagne toast’ at each one, (non-alcoholic of course), and I handed out glasses and noise makers to patrons. Evan was booked for a remote, so as soon as the first show was over, he and his fellow players were out the door in a hurry, and I was left to continue my duties. Not that I minded. I was concerned that he wouldn’t be back before midnite, so I kindly informed Ann Marie that she’d better pucker up come 12:00 o’clock. It’s New Year’s Eve, and I gotta kiss somebody. But about 5 minutes til midnite, he walked in and I was happy. We toasted to 2007. She totally lucked out. After the show, lots of clean up and then some of us headed over to Ellen’s where we hung out until very late, or very early, I guess it depends on how you look at it. I think it was around 3 AM when we left. She was a very nice hostess.

I really do like the CSz folks. Rob and Elizabeth work so hard to keep it going, and they do a great job. And the troupe, well, they’re just a good bunch of people, not like many of the prima donna asshole comedians I spent much of my time hanging out with. (That’s a generalization, of course, there are a few awesome comics in Dallas who I don’t consider to be assholes.) But I’ve always said that improv and stand up are two very different worlds, and that still holds true. There’s a camaraderie among people in a troupe that you just don’t see with comedians. Stand-up is a very ‘kill or be killed’ mentality, it’s all about me and to hell with the rest of you. Very competitive. Not that people don’t want to see you do well, but when it comes down to it, they’d rather you suck so that they look better. It’s not like that with the folks at CSz.

I still don’t see myself ever doing improv. I just don’t think I have it in me. I know I’m a good writer. I’ll try to utilize that strength in the coming year.

The ‘three death’ thing happened the last week of 2006. President Ford, James Brown and Saddam Hussein – well, he was hanged, but still, he’s dead. President Ford is being buried today. Betty looks so frail and sad. She’s being escorted by a very large Marine. I liked President Ford, even though he was a Republican. I have a memory from the year he was running against Jimmy Carter. I was in the second grade. Our teacher asked us to draw a picture of who we thought should win the election. I drew a picture of President Ford with a caption that read something like, “Vote for me. You don’t really want a peanut farmer running your country.”

Ahh, a sense of humor and a political opinion at the tender age of 8.

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