The Summer of Jenn

It has been a rough couple of months. Lots of ups and downs - mostly downs - but we're seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

First off, Emily is doing ok, and thanks for everyone who expressed concern. She had minor day surgery and she's getting back to normal. I know she was sad, but truly I think this was for the best. I won't tell her that right now, but she'll realize it a little later. I am one of those 'everything happens for a reason' kind of people - although I fail to understand what those reasons are sometimes. We have the summer now, to relax and figure out some things.

So, here's what's going on with me. I'm still single. And for the first time in my life, I'm ok with that. I really don't want to be in a 'relationship'. I just don't think I have it in me to try it again. I have plenty of friends. I have my kids. I have my cat. Which reminds me...I was talking to my oldest daughter, Lauran, last nite, and I was telling her how close I am to my cat, how we've bonded and how I love him more than any cat I've ever had. And she said to me, "Well, mom, maybe that's because you're single and you're lonely, and that's the closest you're going to get to a boyfriend."

She sucks. lol.

I'm still counting points with Weight Watchers. Starting on week 9, and it's going well. I'm not losing a lot of pounds, but I have definitely lost inches. I look pretty great, I feel amazing - I haven't felt this good in years. Here's my day: wake up at 3 AM; get ready and walk to train station at 4:15. Catch train at 4:45 to downtown, then take a bus to my office, arriving at 6:30. I work until 3:45 and take the trip in reverse. I'm walking on average 2 miles a day during the week. It's really awesome. I can feel a big difference.

I'm getting back into comedy, although not stand-up. I'm excited and I'll talk more about it later. I'm very happy that these people have invited me to be a part of what they're doing.

I have officially dubbed this "The Summer of Jenn". I'm coming back in a big way, baby.
A BIG way.

Edited today to add.....

And for a 10 on the "Eww" factor.... my ex is dating a very homely-looking 22 year old. He's almost 40. I told you guys he was a disgusting piece of shit, didn't I? I'm just surprised he didn't go younger! He's literally old enough to be her father. Gag.

(Now, I will admit that I have slept with a very hot 20 year-old very recently, but I'm a girl. When I do it, it's cool. When he does it, it's icky. So there!)

Emily had a miscarriage last nite. I am very tired and she is very sad.

Eating dis-order

I have lived a life of dieting. My mother put me on my first diet when I was 10 years old. Yes, I said 10. I weighed in at a whopping 80 pounds - which was average for my age. So my lifetime of yo-yo dieting started at a very early age.

As mentioned previously, I decided to do Weight Watchers. And I have to say, in spite of all the stress in my life, I feel great! I'm nearing the end of week 5 and I'm down 12 pounds. I've walked at least 10 miles this week - I have relieved my ride to work of her duties and I'm walking to the train station every day. The more I walk, the better I feel, and the easier it gets.

Honestly, WW is the easiest plan I've ever tried. No pills, no patches, no diet shakes or cabbage soup. It's not about being on a diet, it's about learning how to eat right. I know, being nearly 40 years old you'd think I would know how to eat by now. It's all about the choices you make. And when I'm surrounded by stress and chaos, I know that the only thing I can really control is what I put in my mouth. (No sex jokes please, I'm not in the mood. lol)

So I'm walking, I'm eating right, I started tanning and I'm feeling really good about myself right now. I have developed an odd craving for ice though, which is weird. The last time I had 'ice cravings' was when I was pregnant with Christopher. I am neither iron deficient nor sexually frustrated, which are the two things most associated with ice chewing (the latter being more of a joke I'm sure, lol). I'm not pregnant either. I guess I just like the crunch, and it adds to my daily water intake.

Silly future goals:

1. Buy roller skates! (not blades, I kick it old school)
2. Try out for the women's roller derby team.
Ha!

Real future goal:

40 by 40 - Lose 40 pounds before my 40th birthday in October. Only 28 to go. :)

I can do this.

Favorite snacks:
Edamame
Wheat puffs
String cheese