The Claw
I’m not a gambler. I’ve never been to Vegas, never set foot in a casino, have never placed coins into a slot machine of any kind. I can’t imagine continuously feeding money into a machine that is certain to give me nothing in return.
That is, except for the crane machine.
I admit it. I have a weakness. Every time I pass a glass box full of cheap toys, I am drawn to it like a moth to a light bulb.
You mock me, crane machine, with your shiny claw and promise of a reward.
I think I will outsmart you this time. You happily eat my dollar, secure in the knowledge that I would certainly leave empty handed.
I spot the weak one – the vulnerable toy, in the middle and on top of the pile. Oh yes, badly made Bart Simpson doll, you will be going home with ME today. I position the claw carefully above Bart’s head and push the button. Miss! It grazes his head and snaps shut. I try again. Another miss. I am more determined than ever now to get that doll in my hands! Maneuver the claw, press the button, another miss. Finally, on the fourth try, the claw grasps the crappy toy, and retracts it from its living space. It starts to rise and I think, yes! I got it! It’s mine! Then a slight ‘bump’ and Bart falls back to the pile.
I hear you laughing, Bart. You think this is funny? You think this is a game? I shall defeat you!
But I don’t have another dollar.
I’ll get you next time, Bart Simpson. Next time.
That is, except for the crane machine.
I admit it. I have a weakness. Every time I pass a glass box full of cheap toys, I am drawn to it like a moth to a light bulb.
You mock me, crane machine, with your shiny claw and promise of a reward.
I think I will outsmart you this time. You happily eat my dollar, secure in the knowledge that I would certainly leave empty handed.
I spot the weak one – the vulnerable toy, in the middle and on top of the pile. Oh yes, badly made Bart Simpson doll, you will be going home with ME today. I position the claw carefully above Bart’s head and push the button. Miss! It grazes his head and snaps shut. I try again. Another miss. I am more determined than ever now to get that doll in my hands! Maneuver the claw, press the button, another miss. Finally, on the fourth try, the claw grasps the crappy toy, and retracts it from its living space. It starts to rise and I think, yes! I got it! It’s mine! Then a slight ‘bump’ and Bart falls back to the pile.
I hear you laughing, Bart. You think this is funny? You think this is a game? I shall defeat you!
But I don’t have another dollar.
I’ll get you next time, Bart Simpson. Next time.
posted by Jenn at
11:57 AM
2 Comments:
I mock the claw! You want something that will stare at you for hours and laugh? Routers will. Yeah, I see them laughing at me but someday I'll pull the plug on those bastards. Someday.....
You will never pull the plug on them because you know deep down that you would be lost without them. They're not laughing AT you...oh wait, yes they are. Ha!
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