Food Issues
Thought I'd share something a little different today.
I’ve struggled with my weight my entire life, as many of you know. Looking back now, I wasn’t really fat when I was younger. A little chunky, but not fat. I was a size 10 in high school. If you weren't a size 2 in my town then you were a cow. God I really hated high school.
At the age of 10, my mother put me on my very first diet. The reason? My step-father-at-the-moment told her my ass was getting too big. My only question - why the hell was he looking at my ass? But my mother took it to heart, and began packing ‘special’ lunches for me and serving me diet shakes for breakfast. I don't know if you recall the diet shakes that were available in 1978. Sego, I think they were called. Horrible, thick, mucous-like sludge with artificial strawberry-esque flavoring. Shudder. The diet was going well though. That is, until I started fainting every time I stood up. And the hives were a little itchy. And so began my dieting career, and a lifetime of food issues.
Thanks, mom. Thanks a lot.
Fun stuff, huh? Who's got Ho-Ho's?
I’ve struggled with my weight my entire life, as many of you know. Looking back now, I wasn’t really fat when I was younger. A little chunky, but not fat. I was a size 10 in high school. If you weren't a size 2 in my town then you were a cow. God I really hated high school.
At the age of 10, my mother put me on my very first diet. The reason? My step-father-at-the-moment told her my ass was getting too big. My only question - why the hell was he looking at my ass? But my mother took it to heart, and began packing ‘special’ lunches for me and serving me diet shakes for breakfast. I don't know if you recall the diet shakes that were available in 1978. Sego, I think they were called. Horrible, thick, mucous-like sludge with artificial strawberry-esque flavoring. Shudder. The diet was going well though. That is, until I started fainting every time I stood up. And the hives were a little itchy. And so began my dieting career, and a lifetime of food issues.
Thanks, mom. Thanks a lot.
Fun stuff, huh? Who's got Ho-Ho's?
posted by Jenn at
8:47 AM
11 Comments:
I'm high, so I scrolled down to see if you had anything to say yet and of course, I wasn't disappointed. I'm not the ONLY reason. You are just like me in that you know damn well you NEED, like a fix, the satisfaction of hearing hearing or reading a comment on your stuff. Good or bad matters not. It's the ego boost you get from having the knowledge that you are doing something right. Something that means something...Even if it's from some nameless face that's too chicken shit to tell you he thinks you suck to your face that recently came out of the closet after years of persecution and lying to himself by fucking whorey, slutty hulking she-bitches when he really wanted some manmeat up his tight little puckery brown eye and is now Uber (I used a capitol in place of an umlau (sic) because I don't have a fucking clue how to make that symbol. Well, that coupled with the fact I'm stoned like a Spicoli at this point...but I digress...) Uber sensitive to anything he can even REMOTELY relate to fag bashing because he's queer and he's here and you better get used to it and he now hates the entire world because he really wants to get married to another like minded sissy fag (in a church) and you said that you wouldn't marry a faggot but you'd probably fuck one so now's he's got his panties in a bunch because you not wanting to marry a fag means that you hate fags and they shouldn't be allowed to get married and he thinks you should die a gruesome death at the hands of a two hundred and fifty pound Rosie O'donnell, chunky ass lesbian, dick hating fucking, cancerously-ambitious in her quest to spread her vile evil, hateful whore that really needs to lighten up from her militant, nazi-like hatred of any and all things phallic and who has a seriously dire need for sexual gratification that she can only get from making a man reject his manhood to the point that he would gladly cut off his disgusting, power hungry, greedy, manipulative (in the interest of time I have shortened this list...) giant ramrod just to make her get a very acidic nut on his fresh, open wounds and then you realize that, "Hey! this fucking moron's a fucking idiot," and you know that you are pissing off the right people and there's nothing wrong with that and after you read that about twenty times, it should make perfect, crystal clear sense. Trust me. And thusly, I have lost the point I was tryin' to make...ummmm....OH YEAH! I 'member...See, you need that gratification just like I do for your sad, empty soul. Saying that the way you did made it sound like it was all about me, this leavin' the anonymous option open stuff. I know the truth. I know you love those messages with me or without me. And then I hit the back button and at the top of the page was the same message as yesterday that I was reading the comments from and I read...
I'm still a bit on the sad side, but I have made progress on another front, which makes me happy.
And all I could think was, "GET THE FUCK OVER IT ALREADY! J-E-S-U-S C-H-R-I-S-T!! ENOUGH WITH THE WHINING!!!" aND THEN i REALIZED...FUCK, i'M DUMB!!...And I also realized that I was reading an old message and I am the moron. Not often I am wrong about anything, but I admit it when I am. And I am stupid. Don't get me wrong, you still aren't over it yet and I could tell it in your voice on that hot, steamy, lonely night last night but you are more upbeat than you were a week ago. (Has it been a week already?) See, things pass...
What the fuck am I talking about? I doubt anyone but Jenn is this far in yet. Fuck it. You were 10 in 1978?!?! Let's see...That makes you...carry the 9...and add 2005 for the AD years...and you are about...HOLY SHIT! You don't need to worry about your big, sexy ass, you need to worry about the fucking CHANGE, know what I mean, Vern? WOW! I thought you were kidding. And why are you bitching? Didn't you tell me that you love "Horrible, thick, mucous-like sludge with artificial strawberry-esque flavoring" (if available) clodding it's chunky path down your throat or was I reading into that? And I'll tell you this about that before I go to bed...EVERYtime it's been great, I fainted after I stood up. Think about that shit.
I need to go to bed. Gonna leave that stoner rant on? HA HA HA HA
God I'm high. Six minutes and twenty seven seconds seemed like a lifetime long diversion in the middle of the afternoon as i drifted into the abyss...
Wow. When you put your mind to something, geez!
It's funny...there are only 3 people who have ever posted anonymously here, and I know who two of them are. It really doesn't bother me, cuz yours are pretty easy to pick out from the line-up.
Line-up. Bet you've heard those words before. Ar ar ar.
It's staying. Oh yeah, baby, it's staying. I wouldn't dare take this down, it's too insane to lose! Thanks for harassing me and keeping me with at least one foot in reality, if that's what you can call it!
And I'm really glad your girlfriend doesn't read this. I guess she doesn't need to, cuz she gets this on a daily basis! Lucky girl. :p
LOL! He puts my pain into perspective, and usually makes me laugh about it. That's what friends are for, even if it does surface in a sick and twisted way. I do have some nutty folks in my life!
He's like that boy who picked on me in elementary school - he only does it cuz he likes me. And I take that as a compliment. :)
He doesn't like me like that. :)
Yeah, I have a lot of boys who are friends, but no boyfriends. I'm not complaining of course, I love my guy friends.
Your girlfriends will listen to you cry, and your guy friends will offer to injure the person who made you cry. Works for me.
Everything leads to sex, Sarah. "Hello" leads to sex. "Can I have fries with that?" leads to sex. "Does this look infected?" - not so much.
A little much? After what my buddy posted above? No way. :)
Now THAT would be interesting.
I think my mom and your mom should get together and go bowling.
:)
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